@TheStupendium

LYRICS:

They say of the fable that businessmen croon
That dog may eat dog but he pays the raccoon
Filling up the coffers billing up the otters, watching them squirm
Yes lions and tigers and bears owe my firm
I've made mountains from founding these half-finished villages
Rundown little towns that I fill up with idiots
Declare one the mayor, flare their ego a little bit
Charge them with fixing it then charge for the privilege
You buy land at high deposit when I drop profitable hovels on it
Each island is like a wallet ‘cus I got the whole place in my pocket
You crank the land value with every little bit of spit and polish
If I get a better tenant than you, well thank you, everything’s demolished
It's about time I took some more payments from your good selves
I'm just balancing the books but I'm still waiting on the bookshelves
You promised you'd build me once you'd patched the fence 
Don't like it? Then bill me, I'll just add it to the rent. 


Never seen a game so twee
But there's administration fees
For this little haven we
Chiselled from complacency
And we pay it gratefully
Slaving every day for the
Price tag attached to the back
Of our New Horizon
 
Raccoon in a tie that racked up a tycoon
Can't handle my mess? You'd best stick with Splatoon.
You'll be knee deep in seashells before we hit noon
And that's hardly a dent in the debt you've accrued
You may wonder why we keep moving around
The houses you buy aren't that structurally sound
A few years will lapse, they collapse to the ground
And these suckers cough up for another new tow
You call me amoral? Is that what you think?
Well at least I’ve not driven my assistant to drink
Poor dear little Isabelle is caught in a living hell
It's fishing and yard work not building a citadel
Overworked, underpaid, that poor little Shih Tzu
Managing a bunch of animals, I guess it really is a–
I Guess you see the pun there
Some mayor you turned out to be, if I do say so
How fitting, in a town full of critters the only human's the scapegoat

Never seen a game so twee
But there's administration fees
For this little haven we
Chiselled from complacency
And we pay it gratefully
Slaving every day for the
Price tag attached to the back
Of our New Horizon
 
Extortion has seldom been so inoffensive
No matter the tax and whatever the rent is
They flock and they herd just to pay their expenses
With no picket lines 'cept a few garden fences
Read between the lines and you might find the margins
So eat up the jargon, don’t argue the bargains
Or I’ll add a ‘No Pets’ clause, it wouldn’t be hard and
I’ll have every resident live in the garden


Never seen a game so twee
But there's administration fees
For this little haven we
Chiselled from complacency
And we pay it gratefully
Slaving every day for the
Price tag attached to the back
Of our New Horizon

@danbull

This was supposed to be our happy place 😭

@tn_030

“How fitting in a town full of critters that the only human is the scapegoat.” 
THIS LINE.
GOLD.

@KirboYT

This honestly sounds like a badass Disney villain song, which fits for a Nintendo game

@ari638

I know this song isn't one of your newest anymore, but I came to say that I think it contains my favourite line that you've ever performed. I know it's not technically impressive or challenging like some of your others, but this one just sticks in my head like glue.

"Or I’ll add a ‘No Pets’ clause, it wouldn’t be hard 
and I’ll have every resident... live... in the garden!"

It has such a gleeful malice and is almost mad-with-power in the delivery, such effective dramatic pauses, and of course is set up perfectly to rhyme with 'yard' only to switch to garden like the little yorkshire critter he is. I lost it the first time I heard this part of the song, and every time I've listened since I still get a big dumb grin on my face. Thank you <3

Oh, and congrats on coming out! They/them is a great set of pronouns if I do say so myself

@Phobiaph0bic

Are we just gonna ignore the phonetic genius of “Raccoon in a tie that racked up a tycoon”?

@gamedifficulty_4230

As far as I’m concerned, Tom Nook having this voice is now canon

@lilcorvidmagpie

I love how Tom Nook is pictured as so evil but he's still adorable when his eyes are closed

@lucyhart3040

I love how the animation is like a puppet show which just shows the façade that Tom Nook is putting on. They did such a good job! Well done, Stupes.

@theheadacheking4869

Fun fact: the orphan fund is real, Tom just didn't tell you which orphan it was going to (hint: Timmy and Tommy have no grandparents.)
(Edit: To be clear, I'm saying Tom's the orphan)

@katydidkatydoes

Fun fact: In the end card “Nook” says he donates to an orphanage. I don’t know if The Stupendium actually knows it, or if it’s a coincidence, but in the lore of Animal Crossing, it’s revealed he actually has a wing (hallway) of an orphanage named after him because he donates there so much. He isn’t evil in my opinion but this song is amazing.

@Gking10

Tom Nook in game: Builds you a house in a day and literally will let you go years without paying your debts and doesn't even raise them
Tom Nook on the internet: Capitalist Loan Shark Monster

@AmranAziz-c9g

Tom: Don't shake empty trees if you want to get away from bees
Give me my money on time or ill break your knees.

@al_x2138

The Stupendium is the only guy who can make a family friendly game like Animal Crossing and making a fan song sound serious without it being edgy. Plus, the song slaps.

@hungolungo

tom nook: *explains how he has committed tax fraud, extortion, illegal tycooning, OSHA and Health and Safety violations*
Also tom nook: *blames you for making Isabelle a alcoholic*

@MrGeorgeFlorcus

"Yes, Lions, and Tigers, and Bears, owe my firm..." Just that one line is Grammy-worthy, damn lol

@Screens655

I don't know how you did it. But I love how you voiced Tom Nook. Snarky, to the point and with a hint of narcissism.
PERFECTION! PERFECTION I TELL YOU!

@AnOriginalBreakfast

OK IS NOBODY GONNA TALK ABOUT HOW THE BEAT IS THE SOUNDS OF COINS DROPPING? THE DETAIL ON THIS SONG IS AMAZING

@waffles4301

No one gonna talk about how Timmy and Tommy about to break some knee caps with a bat and crowbar?

@appleb00m59

I can’t think of Tom with any other voice his voice is just perfect for Tom